Conflicts and disagreements are part of every relationship. Arguments are at times just unavoidable, but for sure all of us have realized, at some point or the other, arguments also play a vital role in improving our relationship. Read on to understand this fact and utilize arguments for the good of your relationship.
Initiate an argument and use it for good:
This may sound a little weird, but you actually have to initiate the argument. To put it in a subtle way, we can say initiate a discussion. Choose a place where both of you feel comfortable. Try making the entire scene as normal as possible. Prepare yourself for what you want to say or convey to your partner, also be ready to accept your faults and mistakes. This preparation is not intended to win an argument, but it is for discussing what you are lacking, in having a healthy relationship. So, keep in mind that a strong strategy is not required. Behave as normal as you can and just be focused on resolving the issue.
Try knowing what is on your partner's mind:
It is very important to give due importance to your partner's thinking. Ask questions like “How do feel about…” or “Do you want to say…” This will help you to see the other side of the coin. Sometimes, what we see and understand is just incomplete without considering what the other person is saying. Give your partner a fair chance to speak their heart out. Listen everything thoroughly and then decide whether you want to reply or just by listening the problem is sorted out.
Three steps for ending an argument successfully:
- Express sympathy: Let your partner know that you are sorry for whatever happened. This will help them calm down. You are definitely reading this because you do not want to ruin your relationship. Well, then focus on your ultimate goal and try to make things better by saying “I am really (sorry or happy) that this happened to us”. Later you can say that “Now, we will take it in the right direction___”.
- Agree with each other's opinion: In any argument you will always realize that at some or the other point the other person was correct. Just do not ignore it. If you will try accepting by saying “Yes, you are right at_____” or “Yes I agree on _____ with you” your partner will feel contended and moreover he/she will also make efforts to understand your point of view.
- Compromise mutually: Every argument or discussion needs to be ended with a mutual understanding. Until you and your partner do not arrive at the same point, the argument will never come to an end. Together plan a strategy, which can work for a while and check if it is bringing a difference in your relationship. Later, if it is not working, you can talk again over the same issue and redesign your plans.
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